So you’ve got a crush on a friend, colleague, or acquaintance, but you’ve found out through a friend of a friend that they like someone else. It’s easy to head down the road of “My crush doesn’t like me, I’ll be alone forever!” but all is not lost.
Before you start dressing like Mrs Havisham, or worse, becoming a taxi driver, there are some simple ways you can lick your wounds and move on from your unrequited crush to find stronger and lasting love.
We’ve pooled all our experience with crushes that like other people to help guide you through this downturn in your love life and get you back on track.
In This Guide:
- How to Deal With Your Crush Liking Someone Else
- Why Does it Hurt When My Crush Likes Someone Else?
- Should I Block My Crush on Social Media?
- Should I Try & Win My Crush Back?
- What If I Have a Crush on Someone in a Relationship?
- FAQs
How to Deal With Your Crush Liking Someone Else
It’s never nice to find out that your crush likes someone else. In fact, it can feel crushing…(we’re sorry!).
When you’re faced with the fact that they have feelings for somebody other than you, it can feel like the end of the world, but it’s possible to move on with a few simple tips and tricks to help you heal and grow.
1. Understanding & Accepting Your Feelings
Dealing with heartbreak is never easy, and let’s be honest, it doesn’t exactly feel great. But as tough as it is, it’s super important to acknowledge what you’re feeling, even if it hurts. Ignoring your emotions won’t help you heal.
In fact, sitting in your emotions can actually help you grow. It builds resilience and gives you tools to handle tough situations in the future. By recognising these feelings as valid, you’re taking a big step toward healing and moving on with confidence.
When it comes to unrequited love, the emotions can hit hard – disappointment, sadness, maybe even a bit of jealousy. It’s totally normal to feel all of that when your crush is into someone else.
Instead of pushing those feelings aside, try to embrace them. Let yourself feel it all. It’s not easy, but it helps you understand yourself better and work through the pain.
Expressing how you feel can also be a game-changer. Sometimes, just getting it out there – whether it’s in a journal, talking to a friend, or even through something creative like painting or playing music – makes a huge difference.
Let those emotions flow. But maybe skip the social media venting where your crush might see it. Things can get messy real quick.
2. (Kindly) Get Some Perspective
This might sound a little harsh, but once you’ve taken some time to sit with your feelings and process what happened, it can help to put things into perspective.
This isn’t always easy when emotions are still fresh, but over time, it’s important to remind yourself that someone else’s affection – or lack thereof – doesn’t define you. It’s not the end of the world.
Just because your crush likes someone else doesn’t take away from your worth or how attractive you are. Attraction is so subjective, and everyone has their own preferences.
Your value doesn’t depend on whether someone has romantic feelings for you or not. You’ve got your own unique talents, strengths, and charm, and those things make you who you are. One situation doesn’t change that or take away from how awesome you are.
This is just a small bump in the road on your journey to finding love.
3. Don’t Compare Yourself to the Other Person
Theodore Roosevelt once said: “Comparison is the thief of joy”. If you ever catch yourself comparing who you are to the person they’re into, stop for a second and remind yourself – you’re your own person with your own unique qualities.
It’s so easy to think someone else is better or more deserving just because they’ve got someone’s attention, but that’s not how it works.
Everyone has something special about them, including you. Your individuality is what makes you stand out, and no one can take that away.
So, instead of getting stuck in comparisons, focus on what makes you, you. You’re amazing and worthy just as you are. Don’t forget that!
4. Don’t Put Their Attention on a Pedestal!
It’s easy to get swept up in the idea that your crush is the most incredible person in the world. Maybe they’re stunningly beautiful, brilliantly witty, or effortlessly funny – it’s only natural that you’d admire those qualities.
However, putting their attention on a pedestal can quickly become a problem.
When you overvalue their approval, you might find yourself acting out of character or doing things you wouldn’t normally do just to get noticed. This can not only damage your confidence and self-respect but also affect how others perceive you.
Remember, no one’s attention is worth compromising your dignity or mental well-being. Stay true to yourself, and the right people will notice you for who you genuinely are.
5. Move on – They’re Not Worthy of You!
Once you’ve experienced the heartbreak of your crush liking some other person and you’ve put the situation into perspective, it’s important to think about moving forward from this stage of your life.
Expanding your social circle and building new relationships is a great way to move forward. Meeting new people can bring fresh perspectives, shake up your routine, and maybe even lead to exciting romantic possibilities.
Try attending social events, joining clubs that match your interests, or volunteering for a cause you care about – it’s a fun way to connect with others.
At the same time, don’t forget about the people already in your life.
Spend quality time with friends and family, whether it’s a fun night out, a cosy family dinner, or a quick coffee catch-up. These moments remind you of the love and support you already have and can really lift your spirits.
And, of course, self-care is key. Take time to focus on your own well-being, physically and emotionally. It’s a way of reminding yourself that you deserve love and kindness, especially from yourself.
Consider activities that promote relaxation and peace of mind, such as:
- Yoga
- Meditation
- Reading a good book
- Regular exercise
- Journaling
- Shopping
6. Take it on the Chin & Learn from the Experience
Unrequited love can be tough, but it can also teach you a lot about yourself. It’s a chance to take a step back and really understand your emotions, which can help you grow and become more resilient.
As you work through these feelings, you’ll start to build the strength to bounce back from challenges, adapt, and keep moving forward. This kind of emotional growth will make you better prepared for future relationships, with more empathy and understanding.
Take some time to think about what this experience taught you about what you want in a partner. Did your crush liking someone else show you what qualities matter most to you – or what to avoid?
Look for someone who shares your values, interests, or life goals, someone who communicates openly respects you, and truly appreciates you.
By reflecting on this, you’ll get a better sense of what you’re looking for in a relationship, making it easier to find someone who’s a great match.
Why Does it Hurt When My Crush Likes Someone Else?
“They’re just a crush, so why does it feel like I’ve been dumped by a long-term partner?”
Here’s the thing: we put a lot of time and emotions into our crushes, which makes them feel like so much more than just a passing fancy.
Even though you’re not in an actual relationship with them, it doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t real. So, when you find out they’re into someone else, you’re left with all these emotions and no idea what to do with them.
Getting over a crush is tricky – it’s not like getting over an ex.
For starters, you might not have anyone to talk to about it because, let’s be real, you probably didn’t tell anyone in the first place. But it’s totally okay to feel sad and take some time to process the loss of what could’ve been before moving on.
According to Lisa Bruchac, a relationship expert,
“Many people don’t realise that even if you weren’t in a relationship with someone but had feelings for someone who didn’t feel the same way, you still need to grieve. It’s a loss…If you had a relationship that ended, taking time to grieve the loss will help you in the long run. It’s difficult to move forward if you haven’t completely let go of the past.”
Should I Block My Crush on Social Media?
Deciding whether to block your crush on social media is totally up to you and depends on how you’re feeling. If seeing their posts is stressing you out or making it harder to move on, blocking or muting them for a bit might help.
That said, it could feel a little awkward if you have mutual friends.
At the end of the day, just do what feels right for your mental and emotional well-being – honestly, most people don’t even notice who’s blocked who on social media!
- Read More: What to Do When Your Ex Unblocks You
Should I Try & Win My Crush Back?
It’s easy to think your crush just doesn’t know you well enough yet or that you didn’t make your feelings clear. And, before you know it, you’re plotting ways to win him back.
Here’s our advice: don’t do it!
You might be the most amazing person ever, or maybe you’re even soulmates. But trying to come between someone’s relationship just because you have feelings will only make you look desperate. Save yourself the drama and take some time to heal on your own. You’ve got this!
- Quiz Time: Should You Get Back With Your Ex?
What If I Have a Crush on Someone in a Relationship?
If you’re crushing on someone who’s already in a relationship, the best thing to do is keep those feelings to yourself. Telling them how you feel could create a ton of unnecessary drama and hurt everyone involved, including you.
Instead, try focusing on moving on in a healthy way. Pick up a new hobby, hang out with friends, or even give yourself some space from that person if you need to.
It’s totally normal to feel disappointed or frustrated, but respecting their relationship and taking care of yourself is the smartest move. You’ve got this!
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FAQs
What Are Signs That Your Crush Likes Someone Else?
If your crush frequently talks about someone else, prioritises spending time with them, or shows clear romantic interest in them through body language and compliments, these could be signs that they like someone else instead of you.
Should I Confess to My Crush if He Likes Someone Else?
Confessing your crush while knowing they like someone else can lead to disappointment.
Consider their feelings and ensure you’re emotionally prepared. If you’re uncertain, staying friends and waiting for the right time might be a better choice.
Is it Ok to Ask Your Crush if They Like You?
Yes, it’s okay to ask your crush if they like you, but choose an appropriate moment. Be prepared for any response, and approach the conversation with honesty and respect to maintain a positive relationship, regardless of their answer.
Should You Minimise Contact With Your Crush if They Like Someone Else?
Minimising contact can help you focus on moving forward and protecting your emotions. It’s healthy to create some distance while maintaining respect, especially if seeing them often makes it harder for you to process your feelings.
Should You Stay Friends With a Crush that Likes Someone Else?
Yes, staying friends is possible if you can manage your feelings and set boundaries. Ensure it doesn’t hinder your emotional well-being, and remain respectful of their feelings while focusing on your own growth and happiness.