Should You Kiss On the First Date? Navigating Dating Etiquette

So, you’ve got a date coming up, and you’re wondering what the etiquette is for kissing on the first date. Should you kiss on the first date? Should you make them wait? Will your decision impact how they view you? 

If these questions are stressing you out, you’re in the right place! We’ve got the answers to help put your mind at ease.

Let’s face it, there is a lot of pressure surrounding the first date. It’s your chance to make a good impression and potentially start something special with someone new. 

With all that on the line, it’s natural to feel anxious about making the right moves. But when it comes to kissing, there are no hard and fast rules.

Should You Kiss on the First Date?

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Whether you should kiss on the first date really depends on you and your date’s vibe. If you feel a spark, a kiss might feel natural and signify attraction

On the other hand, if you prefer to take things slow, focusing on building an emotional connection is perfectly fine, too. Just pay attention to body language and cues – mutual interest and comfort are key

Remember, there’s no right or wrong answer here; what matters most is that you both feel comfortable and respected in the moment.

What if They Want to Kiss & You Don’t?

You never have to kiss someone you don’t want to. Even if you really like them and want to see them again, a second or even third date isn’t contingent on a first-date kiss. 

If you get the sense that they want to kiss you from their body language or if they outright ask you, you can always say no.

Although it’s reasonable for them to be a bit embarrassed by the rejection, especially if they leaned in, if they become annoyed, irritated, or rude, it’s a huge red flag that shouldn’t be ignored. 

Consent is hugely important for any romantic relationship and should always be respected.

It goes without saying that this applies to both men and women who don’t want to kiss on a first date, but sometimes a reminder can be helpful, especially when societal pressures are at play. Remember, “no” is a complete sentence! Always date with respect.

How to Decide Whether You Should Kiss on the First Date

There are a few things you should consider when deciding whether to kiss on the first date. Here are some things to consider before leaning in to make sure you’re making the right decision.

#1 Work Out if You Have Chemistry

Understanding if you have chemistry with your date is crucial before going in for a first kiss. Chemistry fosters a sense of connection that can manifest through shared laughter, comfortable conversation, and mutual flirtation.

When both individuals feel a spark, the moment of a potential kiss often feels more natural and welcomed. Without this kind of compatibility, a kiss might feel forced or awkward, undermining the developing relationship.

Being attuned to the subtle cues – such as eye contact and body language – can help you gauge this connection. 

Ultimately, knowing whether there’s chemistry allows you to make a more informed decision, ensuring that both you and your date feel good about the experience.

#2 Think About What a Kiss Would Convey

Considering what a kiss would convey during a first date is essential, as it speaks volumes about your feelings and intentions.

A kiss commonly communicates attraction, interest, and the desire for a deeper connection, potentially setting the tone for future interactions.

Conversely, if the kiss feels misaligned with the moment or your relationship dynamic, it could lead to misunderstandings or discomfort.

You should also consider the type of kiss you’re planning to go in for. A gentle peck on the lips is cute and flirty and conveys interest. On the other hand, a full-on French kiss may communicate a more intense level of attraction and could potentially be too forward for some first dates.

#3 Think About What a Kiss Can Tell You

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A kiss can reveal much about your date and the underlying chemistry between you. The nature of the kiss – whether it’s tender and affectionate or passionate and intense – can provide insights into your date’s feelings and intentions.

By observing how the kiss feels in the moment, you can gauge the level of attraction and comfort shared. This can be especially beneficial in determining if the connection is worth pursuing further.

Additionally, this intimate experience can help you avoid wasting time on a second date if the spark simply isn’t there. If the kiss feels awkward or unfulfilling, it may be a sign that you and your date aren’t on the same wavelength. 

This information can help you make an informed decision about whether to continue investing in the relationship. After all, you deserve a connection where both parties feel excited and engaged.

#4 Trust Your Instincts

Ultimately, trusting your instincts is the best guide when deciding whether to kiss on a first date and what type of kiss to give. 

Your intuition often reflects your genuine feelings and perceptions, which can be incredibly revealing in matters of attraction. If the moment feels right and you’re comfortable with the idea of a kiss, allow yourself to lean into that feeling.

Conversely, if something doesn’t feel quite right, don’t hesitate to hold back. Following your instincts will not only help ensure that the moment feels authentic but also foster a sense of respect for both yourself and your date.

Trusting your gut can lead to a more genuine connection, whether that results in a quick peck, a lingering kiss, or no kiss at all.

When to Kiss on a First Date

The best time to kiss on a first date often depends on how your interaction flows and the chemistry you share.

The most obvious moment is near the end of the date, right before you say goodbye. This is a great way to create anticipation and closure, leaving a lasting impression that strengthens your connection.

Alternatively, a kiss might feel natural and spontaneous after a shared laugh or a meaningful conversation. If things are getting very flirty, it might feel like a natural progression if your chemistry is really on fire!

The key to getting the timing right is to stay in tune with the mood and pay attention to each other’s body language, making sure that any move towards a kiss feels genuine and mutual.

What About Sex on the First Date?

Deciding whether to have sex on the first date is a deeply personal choice that depends on your individual boundaries and comfort levels.

Just like with a first-date kiss, it’s essential to consider the chemistry you share with your date and to communicate openly about desires and expectations.

Factors that play a significant role in this decision include:

  • Emotional connection
  • Mutual respect
  • Physical attraction
  • A clear understanding of each other’s intentions

It’s also important to make sure that you’re both on the same page about what sex would mean for your relationship. If you’re physically attracted to your date but don’t see a romantic relationship with them, be open and honest about your sexual advances being a one-night stand.

Ultimately, what matters most is that both you and your date feel at ease and consensual about taking that step. Always trust your instincts and prioritise your own comfort and safety in any dating scenario.

How Many Dates Can You Wait Before Kissing?

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For some people, kissing is an incredibly intimate act that should be reserved for people you’re really serious about or have strong feelings for. If that’s you, you might be wondering how long you can wait before kissing a date.

Ultimately, you can wait as long as it takes for you to be comfortable with sharing a kiss. There is no hard and fast rule regarding the number of dates before a kiss occurs; it varies greatly from person to person and relationship to relationship.

However, it’s worth noting that waiting too long might impact the development of some connections, as physical intimacy can often play a role in building romantic attraction.

The key is to ensure that any decision you make feels right for you and aligns with the natural progression of your relationship. 

You also need to be open and honest about your feelings and boundaries with your potential partner so they know you’re interested but taking things slow rather than playing hard to get.

Some people say that waiting a few dates to kiss for the first time can increase the anticipation and the desire between you, making the kiss even better. There’s something to be said for delayed gratification!

Summary: Only Kiss on a First Date If You’re Comfortable

It’s important to only kiss on a first date if you feel comfortable; your feelings and boundaries come first

If the moment feels right and you genuinely want to kiss, there’s nothing wrong with it. Just make sure you and your date are on the same page to create a real connection without any pressure.

Remember, if you’re going in for a kiss on the first date, there’s no such thing as the perfect kiss, especially so early on in your romance.

If you’re planning to take the plunge on your first date, prepare for the moment and find out what counts as a first kiss and how to make it special with the Finding The One blog.

FAQs

Is it Better to Kiss on a First or Second Date?

Kissing on a first date can be appropriate if there’s mutual attraction and comfort. However, if you feel more comfortable waiting and processing the date, waiting for the second date is fine. Prioritise your feelings and ensure both parties are aligned before making a move.

Is It Typical to Kiss on the First Date?

Yes, it’s typical for some people to kiss on the first date if there’s mutual attraction and chemistry. However, it varies greatly depending on individual comfort levels and the dynamic of the interaction. Trust your instincts and communicate openly.

Do Guys Expect a Kiss on the First Date?

Yes, some guys may expect a kiss on the first date, but it largely depends on individual preferences and the vibe experienced during the date. Open communication and respect for each other’s boundaries are essential in navigating this situation.

Do I Hug Someone on the First Date?

Yes, hugging to greet each other on the first date can be a warm gesture of physical affection. If you’re not comfortable kissing on the first date, an affectionate hug can convey interest while still maintaining your boundaries.

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