Does it feel like decoding dating slang is like trying to understand ancient Latin?
Fear not, as we’ve put together the ultimate dictionary of dating lingo to help you understand the chat of the Gen Z dating scene.
Thanks to the rise of TikTok and social media, there are new dating phrases popping up left, right, and centre.
And if you’re new to the dating scene, or you’re not really one to keep up with social trends, some of these terms will be completely alien to you.
Whether you’re simply curious about what these phrases mean, or your matches are using them and you don’t want to seem like a Boomer, we’ve put together this dictionary to guide you through.
Let’s get straight into it.
The Dictionary of Gen Z Dating Terms
| B | Benching – Keeping someone around without committing. Benchwarmer – Someone kept as a backup option. Breadcrumbing – Sending flirty messages that are non-committal to string someone along. BDE – “Big d*** energy”; confident, calm charisma. Boo – Term of endearment for a romantic partner. Beige flag – Quirky or odd trait that’s neither a red nor green flag, but noticeable. |
| C | Catfishing – Pretending to be someone else online. Clingy – Overly needy or dependent. Cuffing season – Time of year when people seek relationships (usually winter). Cushioning – Keeping backup romantic options while in a relationship. |
| D | Delusionship – A one-sided imagined relationship. Delulu – Being overly delusional about a romantic situation (e.g. thinking a situationship is more than it is). DTF – “Down to f***”; open to casual sex. DINK – “Dual income, no kids”; a lifestyle term often related to dating/marriage dynamics. Dry dating – Going on dates without alcohol. Dry texting – Boring or short replies showing disinterest. |
| G | Gaslighting – Manipulating someone to question their reality. Ghosting – Disappearing with no explanation. Glamboozled – Getting dressed up only to have the date cancelled. Green flag – Positive signs in a partner. |
| H | Haunting – A ghoster who watches your stories/likes posts. Hardballing – Being direct about relationship goals. Hard launching – Publicly revealing a relationship (e.g., couple pic). Hinge cringe – Embarrassing dating app behaviour. |
| I | Ick – Sudden turn-off that kills attraction. ICYMI love – Posts meant to catch a former flame’s attention. IRL – “In real life”; outside digital communication. |
| J | JOMO – “Joy of missing out”; enjoying being single. Just vibing – Hanging out casually without commitment. |
| K | Keep it casual – Avoiding commitment while dating. Kenergy – Chill, respectful masculinity (inspired by Barbie‘s Ken). Kittenfishing – Slightly misleading profile or photos. |
| L | Left on read – Message seen, but no reply. Love bombing – Overwhelming affection early on to gain control. Love goggles – Ignoring red flags due to infatuation. Lurking – Viewing someone’s online content silently. |
| M | Main character energy – Acting like the star of your dating life. Mermaid-ing – Being mysteriously attractive, but emotionally unavailable. Micro-cheating – Minor flirty actions that cross boundaries. |
| N | Negging – Backhanded compliments to lower someone’s confidence. Not deep – Keeping things casual or surface-level. |
| O | Off the market – In a relationship or not available. Open relationship – Non-monogamous relationship by agreement. Orbiting – Ghosting someone but still engaging with their posts. OTP – “One true pairing”; ideal or dream couple. |
| P | Paperclipping – A ghoster popping back up with no real reason. Pining – Longing for someone without acting on it. Platonic life partner (PLP) – Deep friendship that becomes a life partnership. Pocketing – Hiding your partner from your social life. |
| Q | Quiet quitting (a relationship) – Slowly disengaging without breaking up. |
| R | Red flag – Warning sign about someone’s behaviour. Rizz – Charm or flirt game. Roaching – Hiding the fact you’re seeing multiple people. |
| S | Simp – Doing too much for someone you like. Situationship – Romantic but undefined connection. Slow fade – Gradually reducing contact to end things. Soft launching – Subtly revealing a new relationship online. Submarining – Reappearing after ghosting like nothing happened. |
| T | Talking stage – Early phase of dating with back-and-forth messaging. Thirst trap – A hot post made to attract attention. Textpectation – The anxiety or excitement of waiting for a reply. TMI texting – Oversharing too soon in a conversation. Trophy dating – Dating someone mainly for status or appearance. |
| U | Uncuffing season – Time (often spring/summer) when people break up. |
| V | V-card – Virginity. Vibe check – Assessing someone’s energy or compatibility. Vulnerable ick – Feeling turned off by someone sharing emotions too soon. |
| W | Wifed up / Husbanned up – Being in a committed relationship. |
| X | Xoxo texting – Excessively affectionate early texting. Xennials – People between Gen X and Millennials; referenced in generational dating contrasts. |
| Y | Yasification – Dramatic profile or style glow-up to appear more attractive. Yellow flag – Mild concern or potential issue in dating. |
| Z | Zodiac fishing – Using astrology as a flirting technique. Zombeing – A ghoster who reappears like nothing happened. |
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Decoding the Most Common Dating Slang
We know, that’s a lot.
To help you understand a little more about the most commonly used of those terms, we’ve done an in-depth decoding of 15 of Gen Z’s latest dating terms, what they mean, and how to use them..
Thankfully, it’s not as much of a minefield as you might think.
1. Delulu
We’ll kick things off easy with Delulu. If you didn’t guess, this term is just a short way of saying delusional.
Basically, people use this when they have unrealistic hopes about a match or think someone else has high expectations.
To use this in a sentence, someone might say, “Omg, that date was amazing, I think he’ll be my next boyfriend! Does that make me sound delulu?“
2. Ghosting
We’re sure you’ve already heard this one, but if not, ghosting is the act of someone completely vanishing from your life.
Perhaps you went on a date, it went well, you continued talking over text for a few days, and bam, they’re never to be heard of again.
If this has happened to you before (you’re not alone), at least you can finally put a label on their actions! That has to be some kind of consolation, right?
Here’s an example of how someone might use this: “I’ve not heard from Sarah in a few days. She’s definitely ghosting me.”
3. Zombieing
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Zombieing is a newer phrase that has risen from the depths of TikTok, and it’s a little harder to decipher.
Any guesses? No?
Zombieing is actually the process of someone having been ghosted, but the ghoster has now crawled back into their DM’s like a zombie rising from the dead.
You might say – “Sarah just messaged me ‘hey’. She’s zombieing me.” – If this happens to you, reply at your own risk.
4. Rizz
Rizz might sound weird to millennials, but if you break it down, it’s actually just a slang word for charisma.
If someone has rizz, it just means they’re really good at flirting and making a good impression with matches.
To use it in a sentence, you could say, “My friend went on a date last night, and he said she didn’t stop laughing. He must have had unbelievable rizz.”
5. Love Bombing
Love bombing is a phrase you might not know, but you might have experienced it.
And before you think it’s a good thing, it definitely isn’t.
Love bombing is what someone does when they want to gain control or attention.
It might look like overloading you with compliments, buying you excessive gifts, or texting you nonstop until you actually start dating, and they start acting the opposite.
Now that you know what love bombing is, hopefully, you can be a little wary of it.
Here’s how you might use it in a sentence: “She was literally messaging me 24/7 for the first week, and now she’s radio silent. She was definitely love bombing me.“
6. Soft Launch
A soft launch is a social media post that lets your followers know you’re seeing someone, but it’s still very new, so you keep the post low-key.
Examples include posting someone’s hand holding a drink on your Instagram story, or posting a picture of your meal on date night, but not showing the other person’s face. It’s all very mysterious.
In a sentence, you’d say, “Omg, you posted a pic of your date! Now that’s a soft launch.”
7. Hard Launch
This one is pretty self-explanatory, but a hard launch takes it up a gear from your initial soft launch.
A hard launch would be posting a full photo of your partner, tagging them in a post, taking a mirror selfie and posting it on your story. That’s how you know someone’s seeing someone, and it’s serious.
This is how it might be used in a sentence: “You finally tagged her in a post! Total hard launch. When’s the wedding?“
8. Situationship
Ah, the situationship. I think we’re all familiar with this one, and if you’re not, it’s likely you’ve experienced it.
A situationship is basically a romantic connection that hasn’t been labelled. If you’re a millennial, you’ll know this as being FWB! Sometimes people make it out of this phase, but a lot of the time, they do not.
If you label yourself ‘in a situationship’, you’re probably just texting a lot, seeing each other occasionally, and sleeping with each other often.
But in the end, it’ll probably fizzle out.
It’s not slang for girlfriend or boyfriend, that’s for sure.
You might say, “He’s been in a situationship for three months now, it’s definitely not going further than that.“
9. Breadcrumbing
Breadcrumbing is the act of someone giving you enough attention to keep you around but not actually showing signs of commitment or further interest.
According to Dr Albers, in an article by the Cleveland Clinic, breadcrumbing can actually be a narcissistic behaviour that people engage in to control or get attention from you.
So yeah, it’s best to read the signs and cut loose.
In a sentence, you might say, “She keeps sending me flirty texts, then doesn’t reply for like 24 hours. She’s breadcrumbing me, isn’t she?“
10. Kittenfishing
Have you ever heard of catfishing? Kittenfishing is its toned-down sister.
Kittenfishing is, of course, a milder form of catfishing where someone might subtly edit their profile to make themselves seem more attractive, without making up a whole fake identity like catfishing.
It’s still wrong, but it’s not as extreme as the latter.
If you think someone is doing this to you, you might say, “You can clearly see he’s edited his profile picture. He’s obviously kittenfishing.“
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11. Textpectation
You know when you’ve just got back from a really good date and you’re on tenterhooks waiting for them to text you? That’s textpectation.
It’s the feeling you get when you’re nervous or anxious, wondering whether they’ll text you or not. We all know that feeling.
In a sentence, you might say, “That date was amazing, but I’m now in full textpectation mode.“
12. Dry Texting
We’ve all experienced dry texting, whether we do it or receive it.
Dry texting is when someone shows no interest in the conversation, gives one-word replies, doesn’t ask questions, and generally sounds bored.
It’s the first sign that you should stop texting this person, call it quits, and put your efforts into someone who actually seems interested.
An example of this in a sentence is, “She keeps replying to my texts with ‘lol’ or ‘nice’, that’s dry texting at its finest.”
13. DINK
A DINK is a term used for a couple already in a relationship, but you could use it in a dating profile to show others what you’re looking for.
A DINK is an acronym for ‘dual income no kids.‘ It describes a couple who both work to earn a living, but don’t have kids or plan to have them anytime soon.
To use it in your dating profile, you can say something like, “Looking to be in a dual-income relationship with no plans to have kids currently – I want to be a DINK!“
14. Beige Flag
A beige flag isn’t the typical red flag or even a green flag, oh no. A beige flag doesn’t refer to something particularly good or bad, just something a little quirky and slightly weird, but in a cute way.
For example, a beige flag might be something really random, like when someone irons their socks, has a super niche hobby, or only drinks out of blue mugs. Do you see where we’re going with this?
You could either use this as a question to ask potential matches on your dating profile or use it on your own profile.
For example, you could say, “My beige flag is my fascination with rocks” or something like that.
15. Thirst Trap
Last but not least, the humble (or not so humble) thirst trap. We’re sure we’ve all done one.
A thirst trap is posting a photo you look good in to attract attention. It’s almost like using photos on a dating profile, but it’s way sexier.
If you’re dating someone who posts a thirst trap, this might indicate that they want attention elsewhere.
In a sentence, you might say, “He’s just posted a thirst trap right after our date. Major red flag.”
Where Does Dating Slang Come From?
Dating slang is born from online life, pop culture, emotional trends, and the ever-evolving way we relate to each other.
It develops fast, especially with platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and dating apps accelerating the spread of new ‘eras’.
Since it’s constantly changing, it’s almost impossible to keep up with. That’s why we’ve put together this list to help you understand the most recent weird and wonderful dating terms.
Forget Netflix and chill, cuffing season, and swipe right – it’s all about breadcrumbing, rizz, and DINK’s.
Can I Use These Terms Without Sounding Cringe?
Yes, you can use Gen Z dating terms without sounding cringe, but it depends on how, when, and why you use them.
For example, if you’re using the word without knowing 100% what it means, that’s a little cringe. Especially if you’ve totally got the wrong word and the other person knows it too.
If you’re going to use words like this, it’s best to do so as authentically as possible.
This means using them casually, not all in the same sentence, and not all the time.
And if you’re not Gen Z, a little self-awareness goes a long way. Something like “I got ghosted – is that what the kids call it?” is the perfect way to use any modern slang.
If you’re genuine, in the right context, and not overdoing it, using Gen Z dating slang can actually make you more relatable, not cringe.
Is Gen Z Slang Really That Different From Millennial Dating Terms?
Actually, the answer is yes. Even though the two generations aren’t so different in years, their attitude, cultures, where they get their information, and emotional norms are far apart.
Below is a breakdown of the dating differences between Gen Z and Millennials, which will explain why both generations’ slang is so different.
| Key Aspect | Millennials | Gen Z |
| Platform origins | Buzzfeed & early Instagram | TikTok, Reddit & meme culture |
| Common tone | Earnest & observational | Ironic, meme-savvy & hyper-specific |
| Core terms | Ghosting, Cuffing & Netflix & Chill | Rizz, Situationship & Delulu |
| Cultural approach | Figuring out dating norms | Questioning & redefining those norms |
| Language used | Functional or flirty | Self-aware, funny, often emotionally deep |
Final Words: Understanding Modern Dating Phrases
And there we have it! Your master class in dating slang is complete, and we’re ready to see you put your newfound knowledge into practice.
Remember, dating terminology is always evolving, so what might be the ‘in’ thing to say this week might not be the same next week.
If ever in doubt, steer clear of the more obscure dating terms.
And lastly, remember to be authentic!
Don’t stuff the words into every sentence, and make sure you know what the words mean before you use them!
Put Your New Dating Slang to Use on Wisp
If you’re ready to chat to some matches using your new vocab, download Wisp and get the convo flowing!
On Wisp, you’ll find like-minded people searching for genuine connections that actually lead to a date, not just a string of messages.
Our smart algorithm will give you potential matches that suit you, so you know you have the best chance at finding the one.
Make your profile today and get set to meet! You never know, maybe you’ll get a hard launch!
FAQs
What Do Gen Z Call Their Lovers?
There isn’t actually one set title that Gen Z gives to their partners. You might hear the word ‘bae‘ (before anyone else) being thrown around, but that’s not as common these days.
Instead, Gen Z seems to be sticking to the classic boyfriend, girlfriend, and partner, with the exception of a situationship, which you can read all about in the post above!
What is Benching in a Situationship?
If you bench someone in a situationship, it means you’re keeping them on the side until you find something better.
Treating someone this way is definitely not okay, and if it’s happening to you, you should leave immediately because someone like this isn’t worth your time or effort.
What is Cuffing in a Relationship?
Cuffing in a relationship refers to the trend where people look for a serious partner during the colder months, usually autumn and winter, when staying in, cuddling, and couple activities become more appealing.
It’s basically the opposite of hot girl summer, where embracing being single, having fun with friends, and inner happiness is key.
Why Do People Soft Launch?
People soft launch to introduce their relationships in a subtle way, usually to protect peace and enjoy some privacy while still letting people know they’re off the market.
It’s also an aesthetic way to post on your social media, especially if it’s date night.